The Gathering

How tall is the door that welcomes our hearts
The door that seems to keep us out with promises of bleeding
The god that seems to speak from within and yet gets so confused from without
A Lord that wreaks of the American dream only because I do
Can we enter
shape seems to mislead and weed out broken dreams
And grabs fear from the deep places
That once stood clean in the shadow of innocent children
Children holding onto their bicycles with baseball cards in the spokes
Ready to jump the highest jump with sound of a motorcycle
Can we enter
Remember when we tried to talk under water
Our words filled with fluid and air pockets that bubbled to the surface
Misunderstandings that made us laugh and say… no no no… one more time
Remember when tomorrow came at the crack of dawn ready for exploration
Now it seems to wait for a cup of coffee
Energy that seeps out of the cracks of the day
We know what we can’t see so why bother to open our eyes
Can we enter
Into the smile of a child
Into the laughter of hope and fearlessness
Can we enter
Into the love of a mother that only wants her child to embrace the simple understanding that there is more… always more… always more mystery
So keep looking…
Go through the door of uncertainty
Open your hands and let the blood drain
The blood that made you human wasn’t leaving much room
So let it go
And enter

I could smell football in the air this morning.  And not just any football… College football!

I am at the point in my life where I have to choose.  I cannot take the time to watch, do, read, think everything I want to.  So, I am a Saturday football guy.  Some guys are Friday guys (High School) and some prefer Sunday (NFL), but for me the College game is where it is at.  It gets confused looks from my girls sometimes.  “Daddy, what team do you want to win?”  “I don’t really care.  I am just enjoying the game.”  Weird?  Not to me.

Watching football on TV means I miss out on one of the oddest stadium traditions:  The Wave.  I remember the first time I ever participated.  My Dad took my to a Miami Dolphins game (Yes, I saw Marino play live).  I saw this movement across the stadium.  My Dad told me to get ready.  And then, at just the right moment, we stood and screamed.  And sat down quickly.

As a kid this was amazing.  All those people working together to make this “event” happen.  I was thrilled.

But try explaining it to your friends at school.  It just didn’t have the same impact.  You see, no one can do the Wave alone.

I have been thinking about this a lot.  As Americans, as humans, as Christians- we try to make it on our own.  We tell ourselves that “God helps those who help themselves.”  And then we live like it.  The problem?  This is not in the Bible.

We were created to live in community.  Remember Adam?  He was lonely.  God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone.”  (Genesis 2:18)  This is actually very personal.  “The man”  is actually a translation of “Adam.”  So our very personal God created us to be in relationship.

We cannot live life on our own for long.  And we cannot be a church, a community, without each other.

The “normal” way of being a church is to find the gifts and talents of the leaders and use everyone else to magnify those gifts.  I have lived that way for a long time.  After ll it is normal.  I have repented.  I don’t want to be a part of that anymore.

We are in the middle of an awakening.  Finding out who we are and how we have been uniquely knit together.  Are you joining us?  When we ask for your help, ideas and input…  we really mean it.  We need it.

I want to be a part of something amazing.  It will take all of us doing our part to create the Wave.

So, I just got an email from my brother-in-law about how he and my sister and their kids will be coming back to the states from Turkey because his father is not doing well. He has a tumor growing on his esophagus. He’s been on a feeding tube for a week because the tumor won’t allow him to swallow food or drink.  In the email Christian mentioned something that struck me as interesting.  You see, since his dad is on the feeding tube it means that he hasn’t tasted anything for over a week.  I love food… I mean, really love food.  I love crazy types of food.  I love consistencies, flavors, smells, i mean everything that goes along with food.  Christians dad is getting nutrients from the feeding tube and is staying fed and alive, but no taste…

Psalm 34:8 says “Taste and see that the Lord is good, blessed is the man who trusts in Him.”

Taste and see that the Lord is good…  Taste…  When we taste food we experience food.  We get to see if it something that we want more of.  We get to see if it something that will satisfy us.  We can live our lives without experiencing God.  We can stay alive and not indulge in his Spirit.  Never recognizing the flavor that is within us.  Experience is so important to how we live our lives.

A favorite quote of mine is, “You can study God expertly in His parts and miss Him entirely in His being.”  In order to know God we must experience him… taste him.  We can know all the right things and have all the right answers and miss him completely if we’ve never tasted him.

So drink in a sunset.  Indulge in a meal with friends and family.  Get drunk with laughter.  Taste that he is good.  Experience the lover of our souls.

Around gathering our “fiscal” year goes from June 1 until May 31.  This is good for a number of reasons.  I find myself thinking about the previous year and planning for the next year every May.

As I was thinking and praying this year I became aware of how “crucial” this next year is.

So many changes have been made over the last three years…

• Our mission
• Our name
• Worship times
• Style
• model
• etc.

I feel like we are now standing on the shoulder of those changes.  And now we get to live with them.

And now, perhaps, we will experience ‘more and deeper.’

“Here is your prescription, some paperwork and your excuse from work.”

I am not really sure who I am supposed to give the excuse to.  And the workday was almost over when I received it, so it wasn’t really going to get me out of anything.  I have it though, if you want to see it.

I woke up Tuesday morning with a sharp pain in my chest.  I figured I must have slept wrong or pulled something.  I know.  Not a very clear diagnosis.  The problem was that as the day went on I felt more and more pain.  And I began to freak myself out.  Just before lunch I decided I needed to go to the Emergency room to make sure everything was OK.

So I drove myself.

I know, I know.  It was a dumb idea.  I have been chastised enough already, but if you feel the need to pile on go right ahead.

After three hours, blood work, a chest x-ray and the tightest blood pressure cuff I have ever experienced, they determined that my heart is in good shape.  The problem was my lung.  And an unexplainable case of pleurisy.

I spent the rest of the night trying to relax.  The stress was exhausting.  My fear was overwhelming.  The thought of something major happening…

And so in the midst of my pain and fear I spent a lot of time thinking.  Thinking about my girls.  About Laura.  About this good life I live.  And about you.

You see, so much time goes by in between Sundays.  So much life happens.  It is impossible to reconnect in the little bit of time we get to spend together.  So, how are you doing… really?

I hope to hear from you.

Joshua

Watching the dream come alive….
Nearly four years ago, as I entered into my staff position as worship leader, I carefully un-wrapped an idea about worship that had been tucked into my heart for many years.  I dared to dream that my role as a worship leader would be less about choreographing everyone in the room to a set of socialized “worship-moves” and more about freeing everyone to dance with the One whom we had gathered to worship.

At first it was awkward.  People whom I trust, worship leaders and pastors whom I love, told me it was impossible.  “People need more direction”, they advised.  “They need you to tell them what to do”.  “What about the new people?”, they asked with understandable worry.

But over the course of these years, you, the worshipers at Gathering, have caught onto this dream too.  You understand the difference between obeying me and obeying God, even when we may have asked you to do the exact same thing!  Standing up because I tell you to is boring.  Standing up because Jesus has invited you to worship is an adventure.  Thank you for dreaming with me and allowing this dream for worship to come alive so beautifully each Sunday.

As we now transition into a team of worship leaders it gives me such joy knowing that we are going to experience richer and more intimate worship because of our belief in this unconventional way of worshiping together.

Worship
There are certain moments in worship when I suddenly know I have fallen into the embrace of God.  And, well, God doesn’t stand still when the music plays.  We start out swaying back and forth or capturing the beat in our feet and hands.  He helps me lift my hands and raise my head.  He sings with gusto and emotion because He loves the lyrics.  We sometimes laugh at my feeble attempts to follow His lead.  He is the perfect partner, spinning and singing and dancing and daring me to keep up.

But the thing about dancing with God is that the closer you follow, the tighter you have to cling to His leading.  And the tighter your grip onto Him in worship, the more likely it is you will end up seeing His face.

And so, the tempo of music slips into a time called holy.  The drummer can kick, hit, crash, and pound at 140 or 64 bpm, but all I can hear is the steady and faithful heartbeat of the One whom I am seeing for what again feels like the first time.  My heart still racing, I will myself not to move for fear I will miss the moment, like a pesky insect that doesn’t see the serenity of a sunrise or majesty of a storm for His incessant moving about.

Whiteboards…
These moments, these dances that are a journey from taking His hand to seeing His face are what I dream about for worshippers at Gathering.  The past 3¾ years have been weekly white boards of trying to prepare the dance floor.

We excavate song lyrics, digging for foundations and truth that anchor our best plans and overcome our imperfect ones.

We rehearse and ready ourselves to play the soundtrack for a dance that has yet to unfold.

We pray and think of you often.  We ask God to get your attention no matter what kind of week you are having.  We hope that you’ll join us on the dance floor this time.

And then we must disappear, hoping to execute invisibly all that has been set forth so that no distraction will hijack–no eye will be tempted to look anywhere but to the One, holding out a scarred hand, asking you to worship.

You must choose.  You must make a decision to take His hand or to sit this one out.  For some it is a decision made as the first chord is played, the first lyric sung.  You are running to meet God on the dance floor or you are backing away, finding your place to observe the dances around you.  On which side of worship are you most likely to find yourself?

For everyone, following Christ’s lead in worship is a single step at a time.  Jesus is a trustworthy partner, never with dare-devilish ways meant to harm, but always with simple first steps.  A deep breath. A sway.  A clap.  An open hand.  A raised head.  An embrace that will show you the way.  A moment when, if you are looking, you will see His face.

The New Team…
David, Hillary, and I look forward to serving as a team of worship leaders.  As we prepare each week, bringing our unique gifts and passions to the white boards of the future, we promise you this.

We promise not to push Jesus out of the dance.  We’ll let Him show You the way even as we remind you to take His hand.

We promise to give you the opportunity to knowingly and willing follow His lead in worship by not commanding a particular set of dance moves from you.

We promise to continually encourage you to stay in His embrace, daring You to keep up with Him as your worship leader.

We promise to not laugh at you as you find yourself singing, swaying, clapping, kneeling, crying, and dancing.

And, when you are finally able to look in to the face of the One whom we worship, heart pounding and unable to move…we promise it’s OK to be still.

I am enjoying spring break with my girls this week!  Don’t worry, I wrote this blog last week and set it to post today.  Isn’t technology at least a little bit wonderful?

I am somewhere enjoying something.  I am not trying to hide my whereabouts, it is just that at the writing of this we have still not decided where we are going.  I wish I could blame it on our spontaneous nature, but I think the blame lies with me.

A few years ago I would have been working this week.  My girls would have been home with my wife, Laura.  I am sure they would have enjoyed sleepy mornings and lunches with Mom.  And I would have woken up every morning and gone about my business.  This was our “way.”

No, it wasn’t that I had used all my vacation time or was in the middle of some big project.  It was my inability to let go.  To relax.  To be quiet.  Or at least to be loud in different ways.

I am learning.  As I seek to embrace life more, I am sure that I am spending this week laughing and learning.  My girls are so incredibly precious to me.  The time I spend with them is a benefit to everyone I know because I am a better person because of them.

I will see you soon.  When I do, I am sure I will be smiling wider and a lot more relaxed.

Are you taking moments to embrace life?  To spend time with those you love?
No Spring Break?  Make one.